How I Use ‘Showing Up’ to Help Me Live with ALS

 

I experienced quite a few emotional dips during my first year of living with ALS. Dips in the way of full-on mental funks, feelings of loss of purpose, not wanting to become cut off from others, and, worrying about my future. To help me climb out of those dark dips and even avoid them altogether, I relied on an old wellness strategy called showing up.

What is showing up?

Showing up is a mental tactic I learned in the 1980s when I set a personal goal of jogging three miles daily. I kept up the jogging habit for a number of weeks but hit a snag when the weather became miserable, then quit altogether while recovering from a cold. Starting back up again was a frustrating challenge. That’s when a fitness friend shared the concept of showing up.

The way it worked was to treat my daily workout as a scheduled appointment - - one that never gets canceled. However, if factors such as the weather or illness interfered, I could change what I did during that hour — but I had to keep it related to jogging. For example, if the weather was bad outside, I’d stay in and stretch. If I was sick, I still needed to put on my workout togs but could use the hour to read fitness magazines or books. During the hour, I could give myself permission to change it up, but never, ever, give it up.

Trying 'showing up' with my ALS

Fast forward to my first year with ALS, when my moods dipped and mental funks had me disappearing beneath blankets. In desperation, I decided to give showing up a try. This time, my goal was simply to get up, get dressed, and go sit in the other room! In other words, show up to the day, and life. Every morning, I put myself through all the motions of getting ready to go out. To ensure I didn’t cheat, I even added a personal rule: no comfy lounging clothes.

“You’re a little dressed up for a day at home,” my husband commented as I walked into the living room.

“Yup,” I replied. “I’m showing up!”

Eventually, I realized I could apply showing up to everything in my life. Especially the days when I actually did go out: to monthly club meetings, lunch with a couple friends, or with my husband for errands around town. In all cases, I knew that showing up was the goal and that, once there, just being among friends and around people would keep my spirits lifted.

Success!

And it worked! Getting up and going tricked my mind into feeling better while my improved attitude influenced how my body felt. Showing up is so ingrained into my life now that I can call it a true daily habit. I especially enjoy pausing and reflecting on how grateful I am to not miss special moments with friends, family, or fun activities.

Give showing up a try. It’s one more strategy that will help us learn how to live well with ALS.

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A version of this post first appeared as my column on the ALS News Today website.

Dagmar Munn
ALS and Wellness Blogger

Show up in every single moment like you’re meant to be there

Marie Forleo